4th December

Its my birthday and honestly speaking am not excited. I feel like a failure and a loser. Deep down I feel like all hope is gone. I can’t even buy myself a bottle of wine to celebrate my 20+ years. I feel ashamed of even letting people to know that’s its my birthday.

On the other hand this year has being weird because I was somehow living my best and worst life at the same time. But the fact that am still ALIVE I can’t complain much! As long as I made through each day am proud of myself.

Am still hopeful that something good will soon happen but still deep down am trying to figure out how to make millions without getting out of bed.

But after 4th DECEMBER am ready for new experiences,challenges and everything that is yet to come

Friendships

We can have more than ten friends but from the ten, two or three are genuine but at the end of the day you need a friend who is understanding and caring.

In life there are different types of friends: friends for a reason, friends for a season and friends for a lifetime. Friends for a season come in handy but getting a friend for a lifetime its very hard and difficult to find.

We have obviously experienced bad or toxic relationships. I have two or more experiences but the worst was during my 2nd semester in campus. If only I knew what I was getting myself into I could have made wise decisions. Luckily, life during those campus days was not epic!

With epic I mean it was not exciting. Apart from birthday parties nothing else was great!! Not until I enrolled into another school.

Okay! Back to the toxic friendship, I got to learn that some things happen for a reason and in my case things turned from worse to good cause I was able to mingle and socialize with others and in turn they became my friends up to date.

So in a nutshell don’t ever hold onto the friendships that did not work out but in turn make them a learning experience. Cause in turn we are able to grow both mentally and socially.

FRI-END

Am currently in my room listening to Camila cabello’s “real friends” and it exactly resonates with me, of course I have a best friend who is a real friend for that matter. I don’t know why am so into this song but it reminds me of my past, one way or another!

When it comes to friends its very hard drawing any red lines cause “friends” think they own you. But with best friends I believe they respect your boundaries cause they know you better. They know your likes and dislikes.

As for me, I have had a lot of bad experiences (which i will share on my next posts) when it comes to friends. I guess that explains why I do not like having friends, that’s why if you become my friend you just don’t become my friend but family!

But for someone to become family it takes a lot of trust and love. That’s why friendship is a relationship which also needs commitment and that’s why it is advisable, that before getting into a relationship with someone first and foremost become best of friends ( by the way this is key) With friendship pettiness and having ones back plays a major role.

Ever gotten into a scuffle with your friend or best friend and none of you is willing to be the bigger person so as to resolve the differences? Or have you ever deleted his/ her number or pictures? Or even worse posted some memes to prove a point?

We have different types of friends but friends that you share every problem and every happiness and those that are with you during your highs and lows are friends for keeps!

Just a thought!!

Am antisocial but social when I get to know people. When I get comfortable, I literary get comfortable, like really comfortable. I don’t know my self that much ( that’s weird) cause if I knew myself I would be someone at 23 but I still leave under my parents roof and still rely on them when it comes to financial matters.

At 23, I just wonder what did Kendall Jenner, kylian mbappe and Noah Lyles give to God that I did not. Am still liking their posts on Instagram and other social media platforms ,that’s what am good at, at the moment. Though I still believe my time is coming! Patience is key.

If you are a politician and you suffer from a disease( let’s say cancer) I believe the best thing you can do as a leader is build hospitals or improve the hospital standards because you know what cancer patients go through. For this reason I believe that we all have to put our priorities first and perform our duties with vigour and passion.

Knowing oneself it’s the best weapon we can all have. If only I knew my talent(s) maybe I would not be complaining about how there are no jobs for the youths or that you have to be connected with high ranking officials so as to make it in life.

If only I knew myself I would be “followed” not “following“, I would have a say in everything. People still say am young, yes! Its true am young at heart but time doesn’t care about how young you are or how old you are.

At 5 there are kids who earn their own cash, at 23 am still waiting and some at 30 do not have any clue whatsoever!